I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
vagina is talking i cant
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
