The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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