Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
