my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Randomize
