He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Mom said you looked used
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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