Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
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