ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize