we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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