Just mADE A PArabola og urine
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize