That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
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