No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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