we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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