your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
