Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
