Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
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