i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Randomize
