You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize