return my video game
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Randomize
