so explain again why im purple
no
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
