just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize