Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
