Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
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