Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
