oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize