How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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