Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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