"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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