He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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