You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize