this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
