Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
