Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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