She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
