YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
