no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
