i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
