I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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