I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Randomize