Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize