if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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