remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
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