Say something about gay babies.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
