The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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