At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize
