i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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