ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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