I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
