Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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