butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
