i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
