Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize