You smell like stripper and shame
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
